Orgasms reached with help from a lover are not as easy as we’re made out to think.  As you heard in this video, the women that were able to climax early on didn’t do it via penetration.  Their lover either went down on them or used his fingers.  Even now, as we often talk about, many of us can’t come from intercourse alone and must self stimulate in order to have an orgasm during sex.

But, as I’m sure many will agree, one of the more interesting parts of this video comes at the end.  I’m so glad we found Stephanie, who is so earnest and honest, and admits to loving sex despite not being able/afraid to come.  In part two we explore it more.

Many women have sex for years without coming.  As discussed in this video, and in videos all over Cherry TV, it’s often because of the absence of masturbation that women are unable to orgasm.  In many cases it can be as basic as that – learn what works for you physically while alone, and bring it into the bedroom with a lover.  But, like everything in sex, that doesn’t work for everyone.

Climaxing with a lover is a very different experience than doing it alone.  There’s so much more going on – you’re thinking about your partner’s pleasure, you’re experiencing their touch and/or penetration, you may even be concerned with what you will look like coming.  With your mind on so many other things, the notion of also concentrating on your orgasm can be daunting!

If it’s a problem, my advice is just keep on keeping on and definitely enjoy the ride.  Sex isn’t about the destination/orgasm (and “sex” shouldn’t really be thought of as just intercourse anyway). You may find the ingredients/situation in which you can easily come with a partner - one in particular or all future partners – during intercourse, or you may have to figure out other ways to become satisfied during sex (my favorite, masturbate while your lover touch/kisses/fondles you).  Whatever works –- it’s all good!  No judgments, no comparisons!! Putting one person’s sexual experiences and reactions next to another is like, to use a tired cliche, comparing apples to oranges.  And it doesn’t help anyone!

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