As we know, sex is an awesome, yet sometimes overwhelming topic.  On Cherry TV, we try to address as many female-oriented intimacy issues as possible – but unfortunately we’ll never be able to provide answers and insight into everything.  However, if you have a specific question you are curious about, let us know!  We’ll attempt to address it here on the blog and possibly even cover it on a show.
Please send questions to “questions at cherrytv dot com” (trying to avoid the spam spiders by spelling it out!).  Keep in mind the focus of Cherry TV is women, and inquiries/topics from women will always take priority.

Little Cherry,

Lately I have been hearing a lot about the importance of penis girth. What’s with that? Excuse me if I’m wrong, but didn’t it used to be all about the length? Nowadays, most women despise thin erections- apparently because they don’t provide the stimulation and full feeling they seem to crave. This doesn’t make any sense to me, though.

What is a guy with a thinner than average penis to do???

-Thin’s Not In?

Dear Thin’s Not In?,

Let me give you the scoop on penis length/girth.  As you might know, most of the nerve endings are concentrated in the outer 1/3 of the vagina (closest to the opening.)  That’s why a lot of people say that the length of the penis doesn’t actually make much of a difference.  Though I have heard some women say they prefer girth to length, I have also heard the opposite. There’s a wide variety of preferences. I don’t know much about your situation, but I would definitely advise you to consider whether your troubles might merely be imagined on your end. After all, men (like women) are constantly bombarded with images of ideal body types that only a small proportion of the population actually have. There could certainly be some body dysmorphic disorder going on (which, to put it simply, means that you are getting anxious and preoccupied with your perceived physical flaw.) If you can’t seem to shake the negative feelings, please consider talking to a professional.

Also, if a partner has told you your girth is an issue, keep this in mind:  only about 4 in 10 women can orgasm from vaginal intercourse alone. If your partner can’t achieve orgasm strictly from intercourse, this may have more to do with a lack of clitoral stimulation than your girth. (She might not be aware of this herself… Or, who knows, maybe she is. The following advice assumes you haven’t ditched her for being perhaps a bit too demanding and judgmental.) If she’s having troubles, you could always try putting more focus on foreplay.  (Check out our episode “The Importance of Foreplay.”) By taking your time getting ‘warmed up,’ she may have an easier time achieving orgasm, regardless of your size.

My main advice?  Work what you’ve got! Very few women know the specific girth of their partners, but I guarantee they notice their confidence.

You may also want to check out the following videos, in which the Cherry Dish ladies discuss their spectrum of different penis preferences:

Penis & Testicles
Penis Cut & Size

Best of luck,
Little Cherry

Have your own question? Please send questions to “questions at cherrytv dot com” (trying to avoid the spam spiders by spelling it out!).

In today’s video the women talk about missionary position. They all enjoy it, and three out of the five women on this panel can climax in missionary without any manual stimulation.

I continue to find it so interesting how different everyone is!! On another panel we did (Orgasm Go To Positions) none of the women could climax in missionary without masturbating. Fascinating, huh?? I believe there are a few things at work here.

The first is simply anatomy. We are all different sizes and none of our pelvises are exactly the same shape. Also, our lovers are different sizes so while we may be able to come via missionary without self-stimulation with one partner, we may not be able to with another based upon the way his penis and/or pelvis hits our clitoris.

There’s also experience. Some women know the exact position they need to be in, regardless of and/or based upon the size of their partner, for the friction to be precise in order to come via missionary. Lucky ladies!!

In addition, I also think it depends upon the type of orgasm or feeling one is looking for while on the bottom. Some women it seems don’t expect to have a clitoral orgasm while in missionary, just a vaginal orgasm. However, some experts say there isn’t really any such thing as a vaginal orgasm, that it’s actually a “blended” orgasm that includes the clitoris and vagina — otherwise there is no release.

That said, during our discussions this last year, many women think of the feeling of intense contractions within her vagina during sex as a vaginal orgasm regardless of no clitoral–like release. (Orgasm Sensations) And while the terminology may need to be perfected, I believe the more orgasms we are able to have — the better!

So anatomy, experience and perception, just a few reasons I believe many women can’t come in missionary without helping herself along, while others can. Now let’s go practice!

Watch Video: Orgasm and Missionary

Bad Sex – whoa, have I had my share of bad sex! My first two years of college was just one big bout of bad sex. They were bad …. I was bad … the whole thing was just fumbling and awkward. There are a ton of guys out there who would think I am the last person who should be involved in a sex site.

First, my ineptitude. Often alcohol was involved — I was scared of sex and needed to be drunk in order to feel relaxed to even contemplate having intercourse. I was also incredibly self-conscious about my body. I was barely comfortable being naked by myself, not to mention with another person. And to top it all off, I didn’t masturbate at the time so I was not familiar with my sexual responses or what felt good to me.

When I did have sex, I concentrated on him – making sure he seemed to have a good time. But I wasn’t present so even though I was focused on him, I wasn’t able to sense what he needed or wanted from me. I had problems getting into the rhythm, would switch positions are weird times, and didn’t know what to do with my legs. Eek. I’m getting embarrassed just thinking about it.

Now, his ineptitude – it’s pretty basic … the jackhammer. The jackhammer that goes on, and on and on, our vagina’s get numb. I, like many women, thought, “is this what sex is about?” if so, I don’t need it.

Luckily things changed. I found my clitoris, started masturbating, and was with a few guys who were interested in my needs.

I’m older now and still encounter bad sex. Like the women in the video, if I’m in a position that doesn’t feel good, I will certainly try to maneuver out of it. Or, if something is being done to be that I don’t like, I will just start doing something to him so he stops. But unlike Katie in the video, who will direct them during the session, I will just say things like “Ouch” or “Slower” or even “You can come at any time” (heh).

It’s interesting, those first few times you’re with someone, because it is a window into how sexually compatible you are. Hopefully it’s amazing and hot right away!! But if not, through communication and honesty – if they’re worth the time – a level of sexual fulfillment can certainly be attained.

Watch Video: Bad Sex